were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
