Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
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