nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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