I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
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