How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
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i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
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Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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