I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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