We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Randomize
