im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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