I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
