I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
