i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
