is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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