im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize