i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
