What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
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