so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Randomize