Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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