So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Randomize
