How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
