Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
