My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
i dont even know how to be here
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
