Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
