Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
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