Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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