we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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