I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
