Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
