My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Randomize
