girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
