You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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