Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Randomize
