Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
