I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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