i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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