I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
