Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
