so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Randomize
