Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Randomize
