Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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