its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
