Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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