I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
