He disabled his match.com account in front of me
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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