Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
