I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize
