Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize