I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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