i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
