Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
