All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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